SEAN PENN

HEH, HEH ! This pearl from "The Great Chrenkoff",

Sean Penn has a theory why people are so critical of his pre-liberation trip to Baghdad and his anti-war activism:

"It's interesting. I haven't broken this down but I would say that about half of the loudest talking heads are people who are on the record as failed actors, people who are envious."

At last, thanks to Penn we now know what happens to Hollywood wannabes when they finally get tired of washing dishes in LA restaurants: they become right-wing pundits. Did you know that Rush only got into radio talk shows after his brief appearance in "A Nightmare on Elm Street Part IV" had failed to translate into further roles?

Honestly, Sean, you're just too cool for us mere mortals and sad failures.

Apparently, too, Sean is so exhausted by film-making that he's planning to take a few years off. At least there are still plenty of places to visit for a breather. Teheran, Damascus, Pyongyang, here he comes.